雅思G类大作文【工作类】高分范文分析-工作与休闲

2021-05-07 17:57:57来源:网络作者: 景景阅读量:

  雅思G类大作文【工作类】高分范文分析-工作与休闲  为了帮助大家能够学习雅思写作,提高雅思写作水平,本文小编为大家整理分享了一些相关话题的范文,供大家参考学习!

  学习方法建议:(1)读题,读范文,读译文,积累ideas;(2)结合组长解析,梳理句式、语法、话题词汇,并做笔记;(3)参考组长解析的方式,从全文结构、段落结构、中心句和支持句写作与连接方式、语法结构、题目关键词替换等方面对其他靠谱范文进行解析,这个过程是真正的写作学习过程,7+考生都在用的方法,值得一试。

雅思G类大作文【工作类】高分范文分析-工作与休闲

  题目:Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities. Does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages?

  范文:461words,字数偏多,考试时写270-280即可,300足够。斜体为连接成分,下划线为话题词汇。

  Nowadays many people work long hours, leaving them little time for leisure activities. There are some advantages in this situation, but personally I feel there are more disadvantages.

  译文:现在许多人长时间工作,没什么时间进行休闲活动。这种情况有一些优点,但个人看来我觉得缺点更多。

  组长解析:开头段第一句改述题目,第二句回应写作任务的同时预告了全文结构:先说优点,然后充分讨论缺点。

  The advantages include the possibility of earning more money, if the employer pays overtime for extra hours work. This can be a real bonus if someone is saving with a particular goal in mind: a holiday, for example, or saving to buy a house or flat. Another advantage might be that more time spent at workenables a more thorough knowledge and understanding of the job. Some professions such as law and accountancy require familiarity with a wide range of rules and requirements and these cannot all be learned through study; they have to be learned on the job. For younger people there is also the sheer stimulus of being involved in something they enjoy, so that they do not object to, or count, the hours they spend at work.

  译文:优势包括赚取更多钱的可能性,如果雇主支付加班费的话。这对正在为某事存钱的人来说是真正的奖励,比如度假或买房。另一个优势是花更多时间工作会让人对工作有更全面的理解。有些职业,比如法律和会计,需要从业者熟悉大量的条款和规则,这些条款和规则要从工作中才能加深了解。对年轻人来说,加班纯粹是出于做自己喜欢的事,所以他们不反感也不计较工时数。

  组长解析:从三个方面解释加班的好处,回应观点句的前半部分。有些G友可能觉得这段的第一句不够概括,组长认为,就有些题目而言,当开头段的观点句已经提到some advantages之类,第一个主体段可以直接从分论点说起,避免表达上的重复。语法方面使用了if句、情态动词、现在进行时、被动语态等。

  Unfortunately, if people do not have enough time to relax, there are quite major risks associated with this. Health often suffers, either physically or mentally, and sometimesboth. Taking time out for physical leisure activities has positive effects on health through the release of chemicals that make us feel better both physically and mentally. Other leisure activities may involve spending time with a group of people, activating skills other than those used at work and thus encouraging supportive social networks.

  译文:但是,如果人们没有足够的时间放松,会有相当大的风险。健康会受到影响,要么身体上要么精神上,有时两者兼而有之。花时间做体育休闲活动通过释放让我们身心感觉更好的化学物质对健康产生积极作用。其他休闲活动可能涉及花时间和人们在一起,激活一些非工作技能并因此形成相互支持的社交网络。

  组长解析:开始论述加班多休闲少的缺点。第一句承上启下;第二句介绍第一个缺点,从健康的角度;第三句通过把“leisure activities”具体到“physical leisure activities”来解释休闲时间对健康的积极作用,用反证的方式说明加班多的坏处;第四句继续从拓展“leisure activities”的角度说明休闲时间对人们(心理健康)的积极作用。语法方面使用了if句、that从句、分词从句等,目标7+G友应注意分析高阶语法的使用方式并运用到日常练写中。

  Friendships can also be weakened because of not making enough time to stay in touch, but using only a little of your free time to have a meal or go to the cinema with someone helps to maintain that friendship. Listening to your friend’s problems, or talking through your own, reinforces your relationship with them, as well as allowing you to switch off mentally from the things that have been happening at work. This ‘distancing’ from work helps you to get things back into perspective and can sometimes help you to find solutions to matters that have been bothering you.

  译文:没有给足够的时间保持联系会导致友谊弱化,用一点闲暇时间去和朋友吃个饭或去电影院就有助于维系友情。听你的朋友吐槽,或说说你自己的烦恼,能够加强你和他们的关系,还能让你换换脑子,不去想工作上的事。这种从工作的‘脱离’帮助你去把事情弄清楚,有时还能帮你找到那些一直困扰烦你的事情的解决方法。

  组长解析:这一段论述加班多休闲少的第二个缺点,从社交的角度。第一句提出观点,接下来的两个长句结合生活实际解释把休闲时间用来维系友情的好处,第三句提到了工作,说明了休闲时间与工作的关系,扣住了题目。语法上使用了被动语态、分词短语、that从句、现在完成时,以及but, and, as well as等连接的复杂句。

  Within a family situation a partner may feel neglected if the other one spends long hours away at work, or a child may feel neglected because mummy/daddy is never around for birthdays, school performance or a vital sports match. This lack of involvement is a major contributor to family breakdown, which in turn has wider repercussions in our society.

  译文:就家庭而言,如果一方长时间加班,另一方会感到被忽略,或者孩子会觉得被忽略因为妈妈或爸爸从来不出席自己的生日、学校表演或重要的体育比赛等活动。这种缺乏参与是家庭破碎的一个主要因素,会对社会产生更广泛的不良影响。

  组长解析:这一段论述加班多休闲少的第三个缺点,从家庭的角度。第一个句子比较长,对长句写作把握不好的G友可以拆成两句来表达同样的观点,准确最重要,不要为了复杂而复杂,否则容易出错。语法上使用了情态动词、if句、which从句等。

  Work is a major part of our lives and it is to be hoped that many find it enjoyable, challenging and stimulating, but it is important to recognize the need for a work-life balance and to ensure that this is put into practice.

  译文:工作是我们生活的一个主要部分并且人们希望它是令人感到愉悦、挑战和刺激的,但是认识到工作生活平衡并付诸实践是很重要的。

  组长解析:结尾段总结全文。

  学习方法补充:平时使用英语较少的G友可以尝试做互译练习,即先把范文译成中文,再对照中文译成英文,把英文译文与范文原文作对比,看在句式和用词上有哪些出入,思考是否范文的句子和词汇更好、更自然、更准确。这个过程可以提升英语表达的地道程度,让作为native speaker的考官读起你的作文来感觉更顺畅。

  组长的碎碎念:8分考生的写作学习方法已经免费分享给大家不止一次了,在做的可能不多。目标6及以下的可能觉得自己要求不高应该有捷径很快可以达到,目标7+的可能光顾着着急焦虑却就是踏不下心来。没关系,路就在这里,什么时候走上了,什么时候就快到目的地了。

  以上就是小编为大家分享的关于雅思G类大作文范文分析。环球雅思不仅有线上课程,线下常规班、封闭班提分效果都很不错,感兴趣的同学可以咨询网站客服老师了解优惠情况

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